It takes a diligent, disciplined individual to handle all the daily duties in the home, in addition to providing continual nurturing care to your children. If you have noticed your nanny’s disposition and work ethic have deteriorated, it is time to take action. 

This section will help you become a better household manager and employer to avoid unfortunate situations with regard to the nanny’s workload and salary (the two biggest issues for nannies).  We will discuss ways to attack the situation, wisely and professionally, in case matters do to get out of hand within the home, to assure you have your nanny’s help for the long term.

Pay Attention to Your Hired Help

Within the first 3-6 months of your nanny’s employment, be certain to pay attention to your nanny’s disposition. If she has picked up more than her fair share of the household chores she might be feeling the stress and the strain. For this reason, it is wise to get in the habit of doing a quarterly reality check with your nanny. As outlined above, every few months, sit down and take inventory of your nanny’s happiness and overall concerns. If you don’t know what adjustments to make, there’s no way you can assist in making your nanny’s life better within the household. Communication is the key to any healthy relationship.

Do Your Homework

Before you have a sit-down conversation with your nanny, take the necessary time to complete the following steps:

1. Make a list of all the duties performed on a daily, and weekly, basis by your nanny (laundry, dog walking, housekeeping, attending to in-house appointments and scheduling; personal errands, etc).
2. Next, account for all weekly on-duty hours (daily hours should range between 12 to 14 hours with 15 hours being the extreme).
3. If your nanny earns a weekly salary, determine her hourly rate by dividing her take home pay by the number of weekly hours she is on duty. For example: If you pay your nanny $600 a week, and she works an average of 65 hours a week; divide 600 by 65. In this case, $9.23 is your nanny’s hourly wage.
4. Prepare a detailed list of the duties you thought you agreed upon at the point of employment.
5. Make a list of the benefits you are providing to your nanny as part of employment package.
6. Estimate the dollar amount you are providing to your nanny via live-in room and board.
7. Estimate utility bills and added amenities provided by your family to your nanny as part of her pay package (potential bills might include, gas, electricity, water, gym membership, etc.).
8. Finally, estimate food allowance provided to your nanny (assuming you are covering at least a portion of your nanny’s meals on a daily basis).

You get the picture: This quick analysis provides an estimation of your nanny’s overall compensation package. This is a wise practice because it will help account for the full range of salary and expenses afforded to your nanny…once you have acquired some realistic numbers regarding wages, workload and hours it’s time to stop: Take a day or two to evaluate the reality of your nanny’s live-in situation.

Evaluating Workload and Salary

If your nanny is making minimum wage, saving money (you hope), and planning for her future with an acceptable degree of happiness–you are fine. Don’t sweat it. Welcome to the ups and downs involved in hiring and managing a nanny within the home.

Conversely, if you determine your nanny is working a meager 45 hours a week, making $15 an hour in addition to room and board, and barely attaining her portion of the workload–outline your concerns, immediately. Period. Don’t feel like you are asking too much. If things aren’t being attended to in a professional, consistent matter within your home, then you deserve at least what you are paying for.

Making the “New” Situation Work

Once you have talked to your nanny, and you feel you are on the same page with regard to the newly adjusted parameters, then you will want to consider either adjusting the workload or possibly granting a bonus to her salary package.

At this point you and your nanny will want to take another month or two to make the new situation take effect. Hopefully, you will find that everyone within the household is working together, happier and healthier with the adjustments you and your nanny put into place.

However, if after a month you feel that things are just “OK” to downright intolerable, then you should sit down and ask yourself a few questions:

• What is truly bothering you?
• If you terminate your nanny, what are your plans, afterward?
• Is there a family member or trusted friend you can rely on while you search for a new nanny?
• What do you plan to do differently when you hire a second (third, fourth, fifth, etc.) nanny?
• What are the benefits derived from the current nanny you have hired?
• Do you enjoy your nanny’s ability to work with your children?
• Are you looking for a change for the right reasons?
• Is your nanny domestically challenged?
• How is your relationship with your nanny affecting your comfort in your own home?
• What adjustments can be made in order for you to be happy?
• Will it help to establish a more concrete work description for your nanny?
• Are you getting ahead with the help of your nanny, or are you barely making ends meet?
• Do you feel you are paying for more than your nanny is worth?
• Do you feel you are being taken advantage of by your nanny in some way?
• Is the live-in nanny arrangement taking a toll on your peace of mind?
• Would you prefer a live out nanny?
• On a daily basis, what is making you most unhappy and displeased with the current situation?

After  answering these questions, you will more fully understand why you aren’t happy with the current employment situation. It’s important to step back and take stock of your personal life, your work life and everything that is going on around you.

Additionally, imagine what it might be like to be in your nanny’s shoes on a daily basis. She, too, has to attend to daily issues in her personal life as well as work life (your children, running a household, adjusting to your needs and demeanor after a busy day at the office, etc.)

Realistically, if you are doing all you can as an employer to attain a proper balance of work like and personal life for you and your nanny, but the situation is simply not working– then it might be in everyone’s best interest to part ways. But only resort to this measure after having exhausted all options to make the in-home child caregiver situation work.